After Darren Rainey was killed an officer on another shift asked me to tell him everything that happened on the night Rainey was killed. When I got close to the end of the events that happened on that night, as soon as I told him “I did all that I could do” it seemed like a big light turned on in my head that caused me to clearly see “I didn’t do enough to stop Rainey’s murder.” As soon as this light turned on, and I realized I didn’t do enough, it felt like a thousand pounds of sadness fell upon me. From that day on I realized that my failures led to somebody being killed. From that day on I cried every day for hours a day for about a year. Over that year I thought not only on how I didn’t do enough to stop Rainey from being killed, but I didn’t do enough to stop any of the starving, physical abuses and torturing I witnessed while in the Dade C.I. TCU.
My FDC prison files will prove that I blamed myself for not doing enough so much that FDC staff at Everglades C.I. sent me to Regional Medical Center TCU to be analysed for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD.)
In my 41 years of living, there was only one time I had to fight for my sanity. That was from about June 24, 2012 till June 12, 2013. As a person brought up believing in the teachings of the Christian Bible, I understood how high God held the value of all human life and while I was in the Dade C.I. TCU, I believe my actions showed I didn’t do enough to stop the violence and killings.
I seen 3 inmates die that I knew (Darren Rainey, Oscar Davis, Darrel Richardson), I seen dozens of inmates denied their food trays, I seen inmates physically beat, I seen staff placing medicines and other substances in inmates’ food. I seen these things done to inmates by the Dade C.I. staff I worked for and that God gave me as a sheep to evangelize.
Even though my daily crying for hours a day stopped in the beginning of June 2013, till this day I’ve never thought that I did enough to stop the murder of Darren Rainey and the violence in the TCU. In an April, 2014 meeting with the Miami Herald, I told them I didn’t do enough. In an April 2015 meeting with the DOJ and FBI, I stressed to them that I didn’t do enough. During this discussion I couldn’t control my crying over my failures so they gave me a short break to get myself together. In an April 2015 interview with a New Yorker magazine reporter and June 2015 interview via telephone with Miami Herald reporter Julie Brown, I told them I didn’t do enough, several articles cite me as saying I didn’t do enough.
It is important for you to know all that I’ve said so far because this information will help you understand how I felt when I was first told that the Dade County State Attorney lied and said that I said I did all I could to stop Darren Rainey’s murder. I was in utter shock that she would say something so far-fetched. I still can’t properly express myself on this lie that her office made because of the shock that I have, that this of all things would be alleged.
There’s tremendous evidence to exist that proves I never thought I did enough to stop Rainey’s murder. Yes, I know I was an inmate in the TCU and I could’ve been killed; yes I know I couldn’t physically stop the abuse and yes I know I wasn’t obligated by state or federal law to stop Rainey’s murder or any abuse. I know these things. However, I also know that I and all Christians in the Bible are commanded to help those who can’t help themselves and I and all Christians are commanded to have courage and fear not.
I don’t know if the Dade County State Attorney has produced something false to support their lie or they’re just lying. I do know that the Dade County has my diary in their possession and it shows that on June 24, 2012 (the day after Rainey was murdered) I stated in my diary I didn’t do enough to stop Rainey’s murder. Also, the DOJ, FBI, my family and media have copies of that same diary so they also know the Dade County State Attorney lied.
I did what I could prior to his murder, but I beyond all doubt I didn’t do enough to stop Rainey from being killed.
The extent to which the Dade County State Attorney will go to to not prosecute a law enforcement official for killing an African American in Dade County Florida is shocking.
African Americans are people too and they should be treated like such. Do you believe African Americans should be treated like people? Do you believe Black Lives Matter?
Please share this blog with your friends and anybody you think can help us with getting justice for Darren Rainey. Please sign our petition on Change.org entitled THE LIFE OF BLACK, MENTALLY DISABLED MUSLIM PRISONER DARREN RAINEY DOES MATTER